New year, who dis?

Welcome to 2016! Insert all cliché quotes about this being page one of 365 and so on and so forth.

Personally new years as a holiday is not a big deal to me. I’m not much of a partyer or drinker, so I’m in bed by the time 12:01 rolls around. In the past I have always started a journal and wrote all my resolutions I was going to uphold that year. So I’m sure you know how many journals I have laying around with about a weeks worth of entries because journaling was always so w e i r d to me… and I’m also sure you can relate to the amount of resolutions I have made but never followed through with.

2015 has been a doozy for me this year. I have took many steps forward, but a million more back. I’ve been lied to, cheated, and manipulated. I’ve been rock bottom what seems like all year…but I survived. Damn right, I am alive and swell. No, I’m not rich. No, I’m not in a relationship. No, I don’t have a single thing to show for 2015. But I’m breathing, my heart is beating in me, and my mind is full of all the lessons learned. I am ready to start fighting toward the life I survived all these years for. I know what I deserve (finally! My therapist, Jen, would be so proud! Ha!)

So I’m not making any resolutions about losing weight (because..pizza..duh), or about finding love, just things I can achieve. Greatness starts small right?

  1. Go outside. Run, skip, swing, bike, dance, do karate for the love of bologna. Just go outside, because its gorgeous out there.
  2. Blog my heart out. I had an amazing 6k in readers this year (Thanks guys!) But I want to write more, improve my style, and maybe start writing for companies. (Buzzfeed, quit playing…you know you want me!)
  3. Start & finish my book. Because God knows I’ve procrastinated too long.. *sigh*
  4. Be fearless. I’m so tired of playing double Dutch with my own life. Always being hesitant about what people will think about my clothes, hair, life, etc. I will be fearless, I will do more of what I want. I will go back to school, chop my hair off, get a tattoo, do it all! No more sissy Steph.

And finally…

5. To belong deeply to myself. This one is so hard for me to even think about doing, but I’m excited as hell for it. My entire life has revolved around others. I have laid down my own passions and desires for others. This year I am going to chase after every dream and every passion my heart has. I’m going to learn about myself, my mind. I want to love myself so deeply, to be so comfortable with myself, that I will have no need to ever be validated by anyone. Come 2017 – I will know I am enough, because I always have been.

 

How exciting 2016 will be. I literally cant wait to look back in a year and read this and laugh because I will have accomplished them all and so much more!

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